RUKIA: It is windy today. What is all this new stuff on the ground? Is that…pine tree pollen?
KIBA: OH MY GOD IT’S DELICIOUS.

*later*

RUKIA: The friendly human mowed the lawn. Here are some bits of grass.
KIBA: OH MY GOD IT’S DELICIOUS.

*later*

RUKIA: Here is a stick.
KIBA: OH MY GOD IT’S DELICIOUS.

*later*

KIBA: FRIENDLY HUMAN PAY ATTENTION TO ME!
Me: What?
KIBA: HLORK!
Me: No! Not in the crate!
KIBA: HLORK ROUND TWO!
Me: Goddamnit! There are PIECES OF STICK IN HERE! WHY ARE YOU EATING CHUNKS OF WOOD?
KIBA: I IDENTIFY AS BEAVER-KIN LEAVE ME ALONE.

(later)

Me: Rukia, what are you doing?
RUKIA: Well, while I was out exploring beneath the laurel trees I dug up this dog toy that’s clearly been here since the Reagan administration. It was covered in dirt and several dead bugs and has a plant growing out of it somehow, so while you were busy washing the puke out of Kiba’s crate tray, I brought it inside to slowly and methodically tear it up into puzzle shaped pieces on the living room rug.
Me: But why?
RUKIA: BECAUSE I LOVE YOU.
Me: Ok but that is going straight into the trash.
RUKIA: No biggie, I have a spare stick that I hid behind the ottoman.
KIBA: NOT ANYMORE IT IS DELICIOUS!
Me: How have you two possibly stayed alive for this long?