Recently I saw an image floating around Facebook and I wanted to address it because I think it raises a very good point. I’ll reproduce it here, below:

I disagree with the fundamental premise of this image, regarding the “name-calling and stereotyping those of us who stand for what we believe.” To be sure, those on the pro-gay marriage side of the fence occasionally toss around terms like bigot, and I certainly am as guilty as the next person. But the two sides of the debate are not remotely equal. Here’s a comic to illustrate my point:

Someone in favor of gay marriage is not out to deprive other people of their rights. They are not calling other people sinners. They are calling for equality with heterosexuals in all things, from a legal standpoint.

That being said, it still raises a very interesting point in that, on both sides of this “homosexual marriage” (why did they need to put it in quotation marks???) debate are people who passionately and truly believe in what they are saying – and, it’s important to note, have every right to share and voice their opinions. No one is arguing that. I fully support everyone’s right to free speech. Westboro Baptist Church? Ku Klux Klan? Convicted terrorist? Absolutely. Free speech and dissent of opinions is an integral part of our nation and should always be promoted within a free society. But this is not and has never been a matter of free speech or freedom of beliefs. It’s about the idea of projecting morality, which is taking moral opinions and beliefs and forcing them on other people.

Everyone has differing moral codes. Many of these codes are derived from religious texts, others from societal standards and norms, others from the Golden Rule (treat others the way you would want them to be treated). Whatever their source, we use these moral codes as a basis for making decisions and how we choose to live our lives. And there is nothing wrong with that. If you believe it’s morally wrong to eat pork, I’m fine with that. I may disagree with you, I may even think you are wrong, because bacon is delicious, but how you choose to live your life does not have any effect on me. I have absolutely no problem with you.

Now, if you try to pass a law that bans everyone from eating pork, that’s where we have a problem. You’re attempting to project your morality onto other people who do not have the same belief system as you and you should not be permitted to do that. No one should project their morality onto other people.

You might say that we do this all the time when we create laws. But laws are not the same thing as morality, even though they may seem the same. Governments are responsible for creating legislation that leads to an ongoing, successful society, and for enforcing laws to keep people from hurting other people.

Take traffic enforcement. You could argue, successfully, that the government does a pretty poor job at it, and I wouldn’t disagree. However, at its base, the government has established certain rules of the road that allow society to be productive and move around from home to school to work to the grocery store and then back home. And they have established speed limits, and police officers to enforce those limits, to keep people from driving dangerously and crashing into and killing other drivers. While you can argue that driving recklessly and endangering other people’s lives is immoral, the creation and enforcement of traffic laws have nothing to do with morality.

I am all for the free practice of religion. You can practice it in any way, shape, or form that you like…until  you project your morality onto others and use it to harm them or deprive them of their rights. That’s how you get situations where a 15-year-old girl is raped by her stepfather and then sentenced to 100 lashes for having sex outside of wedlock.

So, let’s go back to this handy picture and break down its points:

• “Yes, I am a Christian.” – Sounds good!
• “I believe the Bible.” – As is your right.
• “Yes, I still love you.” – Yay!
• “Yes, we are still friends.” – Yay!
• “No, I am not judging you.” – Appreciate it!
• “No, I am not condemning you to hell.” – That’s awfully nice.
• “No, I will not let anyone bully you.” – Peachy keen.
• “I do not support homosexuality” – A little mean, but okay...
• “or ‘homosexual marriage’.” – ...and we have a problem.

I don’t have a problem with anything on that list except for the last one, because that is where this Pastor Chad Carter starts projecting his morality. See, none of the first eight harms other people.  If you want to not support homosexuality in the privacy of your home, I could care less. It’s your belief and you are welcome to it. But ask yourself, right now, if there was a ballot in front of you, would you vote “No” on legalizing gay marriage? If you agree with this photo, you probably would vote no. And you would be projecting your morality on other people and say that your personal beliefs should extend to denying rights for other people. Which, incidentally, means that you don’t really love them, you’re not really their friend, and you’re being a bit of a bully yourself…even if you’re doing it in the friendliest, most positive way.

But that is what it really boils down to. I’m fine with you believing whatever you want and practicing your religion in any way that you want, until you start using your religion to hurt other people and/or force them to live according to your religious beliefs.